The Swag That Will Console Hollywood’s Most Glamorous Losers









It’s the grand finale of Awards Season . . . It’s Hollywood’s Biggest Night . . . It’s the Oscars®.  While a select few will have a shiny gold statuette to place on their mantle, those nominees who go home empty handed won’t have to settle for the rationalization that it was an honor just to be nominated; they will be consoled in the most Hollywood of ways:  SWAG.  Distinctive Assets’ annual Everyone Wins at the Oscars Nominee Gift Bag was created ten years ago to soften the blow of the post-Oscar-loss-blues. The 2012 Everyone Wins at the Oscars Nominee Gift Bag is valued in excess of $50,000. The Everyone Wins bag truly goes to show you that winning isn't everything especially if losing means getting a free safari trip. Here's a breakdown of just some of the over thirty items the nominees will receive come Sunday. 

Ounce for ounce kills more germs than other national brands.  While the standard bottle retails for $4.99, Oscar nominees will receive a 1 oz bottle with a jelly sleeve that is gold and bejeweled with crystals!

DISARONNO $15,000.00
DISARONNO is simply the world’s favorite Italian liqueur.  This awards season, DISARONNO is opening the possibilities for the year’s most celebrated actors with a unique soiree fit for Hollywood royalty.  Each nominee will receive the opportunity to have one of the country’s foremost artisan mixologists tend a premium stocked bar, complete with custom DISARONNO cocktails, at the location of their choosing, for up to 100 guests! 

 PREMIER TOURS ELEPHANT BACK SAFARI  $15,580.00
4 night/5 day stay for 2 at Abu Camp in Botswana, Africa.  Trip includes luxury accommodations, all meals, drinks, all game viewing activities and elephant interactions.

Package of 10 Personal Training Sessions.  Huntley Drive Fitness caters to those who take their workout goals seriously.  With a diverse clientele and multiple services ranging from nutrition counseling to physical therapy, your physical fitness regimen will reflect both quality and discretion.  As an exclusively private training facility, Huntley Drive Fitness offers celebrities a premium training experience. 

 DEARFOAMS $72.00
His and her ultimate comfort slippers.

THERMAROB.$178.99
Luxury heated robe (wireless).

SLIMWARE.$59.00
Stylish portion control plates (boxed set of 4 ceramic plates). Portion consciousness disguised in the design.

KOSANKA $80.00
100% natural anti-aging beverage with concentrated antioxidants


I wonder if Kanye knows about this?  With this as a consolation prize I'm forever giving up my acceptance speech for my imaginary win and instead just thinking about the gift bag. Tune into the Oscars® Sunday night on ABC at 8pm est to see who wins and who looses with swag.